Flirt
Every day for the last eleven years, my mate Alex has been single. And I don’t mean loner-maverick-type-single. I mean full on-blind panic-last dodo on the island-single.
You can see his sense or urgency when we are in a night-club and towards the end of the night the quieter songs come on. DJ Tiesto, that sort of thing. He bounces round the dance-floor like a wasp in a jam-jar. Ultimately getting nowhere.
He has two great tactics for dating. Firstly, he has business cards printed with his name and mobile number on one side. On the other, the words “Take me to bed, or lose me forever.” Which on the one hand, is a fairly tragic gimmick. But, on the other hand is an amazing way to cut out the bureaucracy of flirting. Cut to the chase. “Here’s my card, here’s my face, what more is there left to say.”
The other tactic, is that he plays percentages. And what that means is he will talk to anyone. His only criteria for a soul-mate is proximity. When he was younger he used to be a romantic, looking for his perfect match no matter what corner of the universe they existed. These days it’s fate if they are less than seven places away from him in the taxi-rank.
Look out for him.
